I'm not sure what has kept me from writing. Am I waiting for something marvelous to share? Maybe it's that I know that once I start, it will be more than a little thing that I can whip out in a few minutes...and I'm afraid to commit the necessary time and energy. That is probably it.
Lately my thoughts have been more "me" centered than usual. Sure, the reality of meeting the needs around me still exists, which explains, in part, why my me-thinking doesn't always get me far. Instead, I ponder off in various directions without coming to very many conclusions. But at the same time, as I've let these thoughts and concerns simmer for a while on the back burner, so to speak, I've (coincidentally?) come across things that others have concluded and expressed...others experiencing similar stages of life. And so I throw some of these things in the pot and try to figure out what it all means. I'm hesitant to take someone else's answer as my own just because it worked for them. But I do like taking all things into consideration.
A couple of weeks ago in a testimony meeting at church, I felt compelled to step away from some of my concerns and share some of the things I know for sure. And I keep feeling the need to do this...not necessarily the expressing part, but at least the reminding myself part...reminding myself what I know for sure.
When I look at it that way, everything feels more simple. And I feel like I'm more at peace with things even if they are not completely clear right now.
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